If you ever wanted to throw in the towel and hand over your money to someone else to manage, there’s a group of people who will do this for you. They’re called Daily Money Managers, and they typically cater to the elderly, the wealthy, those who are too busy/too lazy, or pretty much any mixture there of.
And the reason I know this is because I almost became one of them :)
I get asked all the time if I could just manage people’s money for them if they paid me (which sounds super fun, right?), but I had no idea if this was “a thing” or not until I turned to Google…
And sure enough, it was! It’s not that well known of an industry, but there’s a decent sized group of people doing this and they have their own association and everything – AADMM, The “American Association of Daily Money Managers”– as well as their own code of ethics too. It’s not that well regulated, meaning anyone can do it if you can convince someone to hire you (which I wouldn’t ever advise, of course – either hiring someone you don’t trust or trying to manage someone else’s money if you don’t know what you’re doing!), but regardless this exists in case you were ever wondering.
I talked with a handful of DMMs when I was first considering this, as well as those readers who wanted me to jump into their finances, but at the end of the day I decided to become a Money Coach instead and help people *learn* how to deal w/ their money vs actually doing it for them. Since usually that’s more helpful, at least to the audience I’d be catering too (ie. not the elderly, wealthy/busy, etc).
Anyways, I share this with you today for two reasons:
- It’s pretty fascinating stuff, right?? :)
- Someone recently left a comment on my original findings and it re-sparked my brain, as well as a slew of other ideas for anyone who’s having a hard time saving/spending money.
I sat down to type a quick response to our new friend here, but twenty minutes later a dissertation was born and I thought I’d turn it into a blog post in case it could help someone else as well :)
Below is the comment that was left, along with some alternatives to hiring a manager:
This is needed for the following reason. We over spend. If there’s money in the account waiting for bills to be paid, it gets spent before the bills get paid. We don’t trust each other at this point because one or the other of us will do this – so we need a neutral third party to manage it where we give them the money but we have NO ACCESS after that to the money and the bills get paid.
Some ideas for you:
1) Give each of yourself an allowance! Literally xfer like $200/mo or something into a separate account under each of your names, and then do whatever you please w/ that $$ – no questions asked. You can blow it, save it, burn it in a fire – anything. But doing this will not only wipe away some of that stress/trust issue, but also *put a cap* on how much you both can spend without effecting the rest of your financial lives! Because I take it y’all have one or two main accounts set up for all your house and living expenses, yeah? The other idea of course is to go back to separate finances altogether and each put in agreed upon amounts to pay for stuff, but that could have other effects too…
2) Open up a bank account 100 miles away, set up automatic xfers into it for savings, and then refuse to set up online banking or get a debit card so the only way to get it is to drive the 100 miles :)
3) Schedule all your bills to hit on the same day every month (annoying to set up cuz you have to call or do it online, but it’s usually possible) and then pay ALL the bills the second they come in so regardless of whatever happens to the leftover $$$ everything’s been already taken care of. Then hopefully you’ve implemented one of the two above options so it’s not ALL spent.
4) Sign up to apps that automatically saves/invests money for you on a daily basis so you can’t even spend everything even if any of you wanted. I use Digit for savings (they analyze your spending/income and xfers over $$ into a *separate* account for you every couple of days that it knows you won’t miss) and then Acorns – which rounds up all your transactions to the nearest $1.00 and then drops the difference of the $$ into an investment portfolio you’ve set up with them. I’ve saved $3,800 w/ Digit over the past year, and $400 with Acorns so far… they work! So long as you don’t touch it :)
And of course, most important of all, y’all will have to deal with the underlying problem of things.
These fixes will only last so long (and you’re are smart enough to figure out work arounds if you really wanted to!), so you’ll need to address the trust issues going on at some point. My skill set doesn’t chart those territories unfortunately, but here’s a list of the best 10 relationship blogs from last year I found if you want to give any a shot: http://www.datingadvice.com/for-men/10-best-relationship-blogs. And then here’s a link to one of my favorite bloggers around marriage & money too: http://derekandcarrie.com/
All I know is that it’s GREAT you’ve both realized this is a problem finally worth addressing, and you’re now reaching out for help/ideas to make things better. That’s hard to do, so I tip my hat to you, sir!
Oh, and yes – of course money managers can do all this for you guys too, but I’d recommend starting with a money coach first just to get a better grasp of everything and see if there’s a way to avoid passing it all off or not. You can always go back and try out a daily money manager if you need to.
Hope this helps… bet you didn’t see this long a$$ response coming :)
*****
What other ideas could we tell our friend here? Anyone else struggling with the same? Anyone ever use a Daily Money Manager before?
——-
PS: Here’s a handful of my friends who are money coaches if anyone is looking for one (I no longer do it): pfdirectory.org/money-coaches, as well as daily money managers: pfdirectory.org/daily-money-managers. I’ll have a new post coming out soon on this directory, but it’s pretty much a place where I’ve listed a bunch of blogging and financial services people in our community offer as I got tired of everything being so spread out everywhere ;) Hope it helps!
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Funny that there are people out there to manage daily money from others! Good thing that we do not need it.
We apply point 1. We have fun money in a personal account. It can be used on anything we want. No questions asked.
For bigger yearly or quarterly bills, we set aside each month a fraction of that in a savings account. When the bill hits, there is no damage.
Smart on all accounts!
Us too. I love shoes and clothes and charity (not the official ones we choose together every year, but one offs – helping out a friend or supporting a cause when something in the news makes me sad). He has his own things. I love that I don’t even have to ask or check in. Though I usually do anyway.
One of the important things I liked about my now husband was that he too had clawed his way out of debt and was NOT going back there. It makes it so we just don’t have to fight over finances. I also love that he already read many of the same PF blogs and was on the same page. (But also that he’s not too extreme)
That’s pretty amazing that BOTH of you read $$$ blogs before meeting! I never meet anyone in real life that’s online learning about money. Match made in heaven right there :)
On tip #2 – make sure you have no card access to the savings – no debit card. You don’t want to have easy to access the cash if you think you might be tempted to use it.
Good catch – updated article
Each time I sit down to pay our regular bills I wish I had someone else doing it for me. I had NO IDEA it was actually A Thing. And then I realize how much of a control freak I am and I happily proceed with the chore. I’m so much of a control freak that I have very few bills automated. I want to know exactly how much is coming out of my account, and when. This is likely spill-over from my single, one income days.
Thanks for the enlightening post!
Mrs. Mad Money Monster
On the plus side, you probably have a much better awareness of what’s going on with your money than most people! As much as I love automating, it does tend to make you lazy and not catch everything… This is the exact reason I pay our credit card bill manually each month – to force myself to look over all the transactions before pulling the trigger (which is a lot since we put everything we can on the card to earn cash back + budget easier in one spot).
Which cashback card? At the time I was choosing, Chase SW seemed the best, with 60k miles upfront (now it’s 50k). But it seems like they cycle in benefit.
I keep all my $$$ stuff under one roof – so my card is with USAA. Not the best rewards, but better for my sanity than rate-chasing all over :)
Technology can be a blessing or a curse when it comes to spending money! Removing apps that make it easy to splurge on food delivery (like Postmates or Grubhub) is part of my new savings plan. Uber or Lyft are quick, easy splurges, too.
Unsubscribing to all the coupons and “deals” emailed daily too! They may save you money if you were already *planning* on shopping for those items, but if not you’re actually spending more regardless of how much you save.
Interest post J$. I didn’t know there were such things as DMMs. Not surprised though. I could see myself wanting to become a DMM or Money Coach once I retire and want to do something I love but at a slower pace. That’s cool stuff.
The Green Swan
I’d suggest that this couple also needs to find physical reminders to help them curb their spending. For us its our home. Since paying off our home is such a key aspect in our plans for early retirement we try to keep our focus on paying it off as early as possible. Now anytime that I get the urge to splurge I look at/think about our house and it reminds me that if I give in to that splurge that I won’t be able to use that money to pay off the house and will thus add that much more time to my working career, and chances are that whatever I would be spending that extra money on will be long gone in ten years but house and financial freedom I choose to buy instead will last a lot longer.
Love it :)
Here’s a post we did on 20+ triggers along the same vein… Physical reminders help out immensely!
https://budgetsaresexy.com/2015/04/financial-triggers-grow-your-money/
Just adding a +1 to the idea of each person taking an “allowance”.
My wife and I each transfer $500 a month into a personal account which we use for discretionary spending. All our bills, vacations, nights out as a couple, things for our child, gifts for family and friends, etc…. come out of our joint account. Anything we want to spend for ourselves comes out of our personal account.
We chose an amount that allowed us to each have some fun and flexibility but still allows us to cover our monthly bills and put away an appropriate amount of savings each month.
This way,If she wants to spend $300 on a purse and has the $$ to do it, rock on. Likewise when I go to a bachelor party in Vegas next month she won’t have an issue with what I spend on drinks and gambling and what not.
It’s a beautiful thing!
(And can I sneak into your suitcase, please?)
We have done #1 (the allowance) and currently do #2, especially since we are paid once a month. We have all our regular bills paid automatically on the 1st of the month and whatever’s left is left! It’s a great way to force yourself to follow your budget.
Had that problem with my ex-husband! He would spend $110 when there was only $100 in the account because payday was tomorrow. We did the allowance thing and he resented me and told me I was too controlling! I give these 2 kudos because it sounds like they “both” want to change and be in control. My current husband and I do his/her/ours. We have an ours that pays all the household bills, car insurance, mortgage, etc. We have our own for us to build wealth for retirement, car payments, our extras! I have to say, I feel that this works best because your building and talking more about the future. One of our goals was a trip to Ireland that will cost a base of $6,400.00 and we have been saving for this vacation for 2 years and it will be wonderful to have it paid before we even go! Freedom to enjoy ~
While I still find the “trial marriage” term more painful than funny, it is true how much a first marriage can shape what you seek in a second marriage (or won’t accept), and then makes you SO thankful for characteristic of the new partner. In this case, you meaning one, or really me. :)
Rock on!!! I would be so miserable with someone who sucked with their money and brought me into it… I never paid attention to this quality much when wooing my own wife, but thank goodness she happened to be good with her money even though she can’t stand dealing with it all… Better for me I guess so I can handle :)
Use You Needa Budget. You assign a “job” to every dollar as it comes in – then you look at the budget vs the balance in your bank account. It got us debt free (other than mortgage and one car payment) and we are always a month ahead. As each April paycheck comes in, I send it to the May budget; then on May 1st I’ll allocate it – including fun money that we withdraw weekly.
The “always a month ahead” part is the best :)
Here’s an article we did on YNAB if anyone reading this is interested:
https://budgetsaresexy.com/2016/01/you-need-a-budget-ynab-review/
We have talked about setting aside an allowance fo each of us every month, not because we have problems with bills – just to add another layer of accountability.
We started using acorns awhile back to save automatically, haven’t paid to much attention to it (which is the point I think).
Another way that I found helpful is to print out what I call a payment schedule. It is a simple table showing when each bill needs to be paid and whether it is paid automatically or not. It also has another column indicating where the payment will come from, e.g. Bank A’s checking account, Bank B’s credit card, etc.
The advantage with this is that you can easily check, if fund is coming from a checking/savings account, if there is still enough money in it days or weeks before the payment is posted. This can potentially save you overdraft charges.
It will also provide you the list of automatic payments that are being paid by a specific credit card. So when that credit card gets stolen or hacked and your bank replaces it, you know the bills that will get affected that you need to update.
That is a good idea. We do it mentally, but often get confused.
Yup! Brilliant idea!
We keep all this in our main $$$ spreadsheet, which also contains net worth, calculator to early retirement, etc etc….
Having everything in one spot makes it a ton easier too :)
To go along with setting an allowance, I have a friend who has recurring pre-paid cards that he gets every month. He had awful spending habits so one day he thought having a pre-paid card would be best. It is basically like a cash allowance as he can only spend so much and it actually works :)
We do a recurring monthly Amazon gift card of a set amount (sent by my hubby from his Amazon account, using our rewards credit card), then I do all Amazon purchases. Sometimes I use Amazon for groceries or lots of gifts (which are a different bucket in our budget) so I get topped up a bit. It helps with spending – it’s like a challenge and a competition against myself.
So clever!
I usually schedule when to pay my bills to avoid penalty. I just set an amount how much money should I put it on my other bank.
It sounds so easy to just turn over – NO NO NO – stop right there:) I could never turn over the handling of my money to someone else. I earned it – I want complete control.
Talking to a money coach sounds like a much better idea, sometimes you really need advice or a new perspective.
Handling money as a couple can be tricky, but for your own peace of mind and a secure financial future, you need to address whatever issues you have, even if it is difficult.
I sometimes think I would like to handle other people’s money since I love looking at other people’s expenses and net worth online! But when it comes down to it, that’s probably a responsibility I’d rather not take on.
Definitely #2! An automatic deduction from each paycheck going to this remote, unaccessible savings account works wonders!
I think it would be cool to be a money manager.
I pay my bills as soon as they come in, otherwise they will get lost in all the papers on my desk & some places have short grace period, so for the bank to send a check through bill pay I need to pay it immediately.
I could setup autopay, but I do manual pay each month so I know how much we actually end up spending. Something I didn’t do before becoming & parent.
I hired my husband to be my daily money manager when I married him ;). He’s sexy and the services cost me $0. I tell him exactly how to allocate everything and he physically takes care of it online. I’m good at planning but suck at execution and he’s the opposite so our arrangement is golden :).
Haha…. smart woman :)
I have frequently joked that life would be better if people would just let me manage their money and boss them around! ;D
An old friend of mine casually asked the other day if I’d ever read Mr Money Moustache, and smooth anonymous-PF-blogger operator that I am, I froze and stuttered, uh, maybe, once, why??
She’s a good money manager herself and I didn’t know she’d been reading PF blogs! I wish I could tell her I read a lot of them *cough*
Haha… maybe she reads YOURS and you don’t even know! (And she doesn’t know it’s YOU?)
Reminds me of a time years ago when I went to a meet up of food bloggers (a whole other interesting niche!) and when someone heard I blogged about $$$ asked if I knew a guy named “J. Money”..
I was like, nope! But sounds like a bad ass! haha…
This was before the days of anyone knowing what I looked like online… it was fun :)
Hahah THAT WOULD TERRIFY ME.
She’s one of my oldest friends and I can rely on her discretion but I do NOT want to be outed :D
I just recently came across your blog J. Money, and I love it. Keep up the good work. I love meeting new people that recognize how “sexy” it really is to be financial savvy.
I think setting up allowances is a great idea. My wife and I did that initially, when we decided to take this trip into frugality and live within our means. It was a way of not feeling miserable by all the cost cutting. The great thing is that you get used to it and before you know it you have savings built up. That’s a seriously rewarding outcome and completely re-affirms why you’re doing it.
The other great idea is spreading out the large irregular bills (xmas, life insurance, etc) into monthly installments and having them automatically pulled into a savings account each month. Then when the bill comes do, you just pull it back out of savings. That helped us tremendously during the holiday seasons.
Yup! People tend to get hardcore one way or the other (“Let’s save save save and not spend a penny!” or “let’s spend it all and not save anything!”) and there really is that fine balance you need to do to keep the motivation going… It’s always okay to spend on stuff you care about, provided you do it responsibly.
Glad you’re enjoying the blog – thanks for adding to the discussion :)
I can see where this niche is useful for people. I have so many friends who are just overwhelmed by the prospect of managing their own money. They are paralyzed, they don’t know where to start and they don’t want to be the ones to blame if they lose it all. However, I think your right. At some point, you should suck it up and become responsible for the management of your own money. There is a learning curve, but it ain’t rocket science. (Disclosure: I am not a rocket scientist)
Haha…
I’m waiting one day for a rocket scientist to jump in – on any topic! – and say yes! It IS rocket science!!! :)
But yes – paralyziation is huge and it sucks… which is why I love all the apps and tricks and technology these days that helps to *get the ball moving* which then turns into working on other areas of your $$$ which then leads to a better life and happiness and eventually total freedom! But it all starts with making a small move and then upping your game as the weeks/months/years go by…
The concepts aren’t hard at all, just a matter of figuring out what makes you take action/get excited to work on.
Tell you what, I’ve had brain surgeons ask for money advice so guess what? We’re doing something that even that elite group can find baffling :)
I’m feeling smarter by the minute!
Hey J.Money,
I couldn’t imagine anyone else managing my cash! I like the control… plus I like to budget! (Budgets are sexy after all!) ;-)
Like you said in your post, I can see a good use for these types of companies especially for elderly people who can keep up with bills and especially technology that they are not used to.
I’ll keep managing my own dollars…. thanks but no thanks :-)
I can see how being a Daily Money Manager would be fun. I enjoy finding ways to reduce my bills, I can only imagine how much fun it would be to work on behalf of others. Tip #3 is on my hit list of things I want to do to simply my finances. Different scenario, but a cool thought. I’m going to need a heck of a lot of coffee to knock it all out in one day though.
To solve their problem, I’d suggest something similar to #1 and #3. Just set up an account that will cover the monthly expenses and have a portion of your pay check directly deposited into the account. It sounds like the potential to withdraw is a major problem, so as you suggest, do not set up online banking. I also would burn all checks and cut up all debit cards to prevent the temptation. It is an interesting problem to have and one I am kind of having a hard time relating to (to be honest). I hope the suggestions from you and all the other commenters can help this person out and get them saving/moving in the right direction.
Bert
In some cases, the line between money manager and coach can get a bit blurry. When working with clients and people who seek my help, I find that I often need to act a bit more as a manager at first, until they buy into the change I am teaching them about. When they adopt the plan as their own, that is when I get to back off and begin coaching.
The best of both worlds :) And then if you REALLY do your job well, they won’t need to rely on you at all! That’s what I always told all my clients when coaching… “Hopefully you won’t need me this time next year” haha…
Have you seen this week’s Mindy Project on Hulu? It’s all about this very topic! It was funny so check it out if you have time.
A friend of mine is a lawyer (as is her husband) and she keeps saying that she wishes she could hire someone to take care of her money for her. I always reply that she could do that but runs the risk of getting ripped off :) I’d tell her about this but I’m too worried she’d actually do it!
Haha…
Haven’t watched any of the Mindy Projects yet actually now that you mention it (I’ve heard of it of course just never seem to come across it?) but will try and remember to find it and check it out :) It’ll make for a great first impression I’m sure! Haha…
J. Money,
I read your posts from several years ago when you were very excited to be a money manager. Your goals seemed to change and then you did coaching. Now it seems as though you don’t do that anymore. Why did you change your mind on the managing and coaching. Please share your experience on why you no longer want to do either. Thanks!
Oh man, well, it was a LOT of fun actually helping people – especially once they got that “a-ha” moment!, but it ended up taking up a lot more time (and energy) than I realized, and I started slacking on my more important projects. Like this blog and Rockstar Finance. I still coach some of my older clients here and there, but outside of that I stick to helping out online right now.
Def. worth trying out if it’s something you’re interested in though! You learn a TON about how people think (it’s more of a psychology session than a money one, really), and it’s cool to watch them progress as the months go on. It was a fun experience :)
I need help right. Now i can not save no money i have a lot of bill cant you help me
So I came across both your topics on this subject by doing the exact same Google search you did. I’m a bit overwhelmed by all my monthly income, bills, stock holdings, rental properties, etc.. I also work long hours and travel a lot for work so keeping track of all my bills becomes a serious chore and often times falls to the bottom of my priorities. I find myself being late paying my bills and even fell way behind a couple of times. Now I understand money management strategies, budgets, etc, but I simply don’t have the time to deal with it and I’d rather be out making more. My problem is never having enough money to pay my bills, I simply lose track of everything. I’d absolutely love to find someone to do this for me. I’m not sure that I have enough to justify a full blown accountant and I have a money manager that handles my long term investment strategy with accounting included. I just need someone to handle my monthly cash flow. My only concern is that opening up all my accounts to someone is terrifying. Does the Association kinda vet it’s members and verify their legitimacy? Do they maintain a list of “trusted DMMs”?
I feel like you’d be a perfect candidate for DMM :)
I’m not sure of the ins and outs of the association, but I’m sure some poking around their website would get you what you need: http://www.aadmm.com/
Here’s the link for searching for them: http://www.aadmm.com/findDMM.php
And here’s a note from it: “AADMM does not endorse nor guarantee the services of any member listed in the “Find a DMM” section. However, all current AADMM members listed below have signed a Code of Ethics. We always encourage consumers to interview and ask for client or personal references before commencing services from a DMM. Be sure to review our list of questions to ask before hiring a DMM.”
While I haven’t worked with any w/ my own money, these two DMMs here I’ve personally spoken with on the phone and were super helpful and seemed to really care and know what they’re doing. Maybe start your search with them and see how it goes?
http://directory.rockstarfinance.com/daily-money-managers
Good luck!