So yeah, don’t even know where to start on this one :) Don’t have any kids of my own yet, and haven’t a clue about child support and how exactly all that stuff works out. All I know is it makes me sad. Mainly for the kids, but also for their wallets. 60% is a LOT of money! Man…
I’m hoping some of you can chime in and share some of your thoughts? Maybe you’re experiencing something similar and/or have advice on how to improve their situation? I know our reader would REALLY really appreciate it, and I think it’ll help the others out there going through the same thing that may be too afraid to ask. Here’s the situation:
My husband and I have been happily for married for 3 years. I’m his second wife and he’s got two children from a previous marriage. She lives 9 hours away so we get the children on long breaks, summers, etc.
I don’t plan to have any kids of my own… reason #1 being we can’t afford them!
The custodial parent, ex-wife, gets 60% of his net income for two children. Two whole pay checks plus part of another go straight to her! Every time there’s a change in circumstance, (oldest takes piano lessons, youngest enrolls in ballet), we go back to court, pay more legal fees and ultimately, the CS order is increased. He knows the children are his financial responsibility too… but good God! He’s gotta eat! I don’t know how he’d survive financially if he wasn’t married.
He and his ex-wife both bring home about $3000 per month. Only, we’re only able to see about $1000+/- of his money after witholdings and CS. He could get a second job… but ultimately, he’d just pay out more and they payoff to us wouldn’t be worth the time away from home?
I knew when I married him I’d be taking a financial hit, and I have. I still manage to save for retirement, not incur debt and keep a little cash tucked away but we definitely don’t live the lifestyle we would otherwise be able to afford. My poor husband can’t afford to put anything away for retirement. We don’t have excessive debts, just a car payment and two student loans. We don’t have any credit cards. We don’t own our home. We don’t shop excessively. We don’t eat out. You can imagine the resentment I feel for working my butt off to pay for someone else’s kids. But, what we do for love, right?
My husband and I both have good jobs with good benefits. I’m sure there’s lot of families out there in this situation.
What’s your advice on coping with ever increasing child support payments? Do you put off saving and then “double up” the saving once the kids are grown? I’m able to put some of my check away into our retirement… but what about my husband? Does he have to put his financial planning on hold for the next 13 years? Do you think it’s “unethical” to make a minimal cash income on the side and not report it? **I think I do **
Whatcha got for her, friends? Let’s try and get them on a good game plan :) I’m drawing a blank… except for that last one, I don’t mess around w/ that non reporting stuff. Too afraid of getting in trouble!
Jay loves talking about money, collecting coins, blasting hip-hop, and hanging out with his three beautiful boys. You can check out all of his online projects at jmoney.biz. Thanks for reading the blog!